Patching Cracks

“A man and a woman are walking up to a building. The man notices the woman and runs ahead to open and hold the door for her. As she walks in, she turns to the man and asks ‘Are you holding this door because I am a woman?’ He responds: ‘No. I am holding it because I am a gentleman.’” I’ve heard this anecdote hundreds of times from a good friend of mine who is a pastor.

He tells it frequently to make the same point: It’s wise to act based on your identity, not based on the situation you find yourself in. In the story, the guy holds the door based on his values rather than the expectations of tho...