My Answer

 

August 8, 2018



Q: We’ve been invited to a family reunion this summer, and to be honest I’m dreading it. Some in our extended family haven’t spoken to each other in years, and instead of being a happy time I’m afraid it could be tense. Should we even go?

A: I can understand why you might want to avoid this event; after all, no one likes to be caught up in an unpleasant situation. When we face hard decisions (no matter what they are), it’s always tempting to take the easy way out—which in this case probably would be to stay away.

But the easiest path isn’t always the right path, and I hope you’ll seek God’s will in this matter. For one thing, staying away might create misunderstanding (and even conflict) between you and your hosts and others in your family. After all, you don’t even know if those who might cause problems will be there.

But a more important issue is this: God may want you to attend—not just to enjoy seeing your family, but to be a peacemaker. The Bible says, “Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace” (Romans 14:19). I don’t know how God might use you, but by showing love to those who are hard to love, and by refusing to get swept into conversations that might lead to controversy, you can bring peace to this gathering. Your example could help others realize the importance of family harmony.

Suggest to your hosts that they plan enough activities to keep people occupied. They also might collect old photos from family members that could bring back pleasant memories (and provide amusement!). Most of all, surround your plans with prayer, and ask God to help you bring your family closer—to each other, and to Christ.

Q: My best friend was killed in a tragic motorcycle accident a few weeks ago, and it’s really hit me hard. I’ve never given any thought to death, but now I can’t avoid it. Frankly, I’m scared, because I know I’m not ready to die. How can I be ready?

A: One of the Bible’s greatest truths, although it’s one that’s hard for us to accept sometimes, is that God is able to bring good out of even the most senseless tragedy. I pray this may be the case for you.

What do I mean? Simply this. All your life, you’ve lived for yourself, never thinking about God or doing anything to prepare for the inevitable moment when you will die and meet God. And it’s very likely you would have continued this way the rest of your life, if it hadn’t been for your friend’s death. Now this tragedy has made you stop and think about your own need for God—and if your friend’s tragic death now causes you to turn to Christ, good will have come from it.

Only one thing will keep us out of heaven, and that is our sin. The problem, however, is that we can’t cleanse ourselves of sin; it simply isn’t possible. But Christ came into the world to do for us what we could never do for ourselves. He came to forgive us, cleanse us and open heaven’s door for us, through His death and resurrection for us.

Don’t cling to your sins any longer, but turn to Jesus Christ and open your heart and life to Him today. God’s promise is for you: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).

Q: My sister is angry with me because I was chosen over her to lead an important program at church. She has turned many of my friends against me and it is hard to forgive her for making my life miserable. Am I wrong? — A.S

A: Forgiveness is one of the most beautiful words in the human vocabulary and is best illustrated by God’s forgiveness of sin. When someone sins against us, they bear a terrible guilt. Likewise, when we refuse to forgive a wrong, we become part of the problem. When God’s people practice forgiveness, sweetness replaces harshness.

We cannot force another to have a spirit of forgiveness, but we can demonstrate it by how we react. It is not always possible to mend a broken relationship. Some people refuse to accept responsibility for what they have done, always blaming someone else for what happened. Be willing to go the extra mile in an effort to be reconciled with someone who has turned against you, and remember always to pray for them. Remember to treat others as you would like to be treated (Luke 6:31).

A marvelous example of this is revealed in the life of Joseph. His brothers were jealous of him and sold him into slavery. But as the Old Testament story unfolds in Genesis 50, we see that Joseph did not hold it against them. The Lord used Joseph to save his family, and even a whole nation. Because of Joseph’s demonstration of forgiveness, he was blessed of God. If we cannot find it in our hearts to forgive within our own family, we will never exhibit this attribute of Christ with others and know God’s blessings. “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you” (Matthew 6:14).

 
 

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